An Ending Before its Beginning

Let’s say a silent prayer for the guy whose heart got broken tonight.

As the world revolves around the sun, as the moon rise above the heads of half our planet, as some of our kind party with happiness, and as some of our species dream mirthful dreams, a guy silently sits in some corner lamenting over a love that has fallen apart when it hasn’t even started.

[Okay, I just want to give it some color.]

My bestfriend Kristin got asked on a movie date by one of his guy friends from her university two days ago (Tuesday). Caught off hand, she gave her “yes”. After some time on the same day, she realized that she doesn’t want to go out with him tomorrow unfortunately she had already given him her word.

[“Max! Red alert! How do I get back my word?”]

It’s not really a big deal for majority of the population, but for college virgins like us who never experienced dating ever it’s a huge problem.

Kristin immediately texted me after the whole incident asking for help as to how she’ll tell the guy that she didn’t want to go out with him and that she was just taken by surprise when she said ‘yes’. The inexperienced me didn’t know how to respond nor do I know how to turn down a guy properly. I know I wasn’t much of a help to my bestfriend but tonight she was able to tell the guy what she truly wanted to say.

Believe it or not it took us three days to figure out what to do and how to do it. Sorry we’re just naïve regarding such matters. We agreed that she’ll tell the guy personally today that she’ll be cancelling for tomorrow’s movie date. However, Kristin wasn’t able to gather the courage to do it.

Hence, we spent 30 minutes formulating the message she’ll send Jomell (the guy). It was the most taxing 30 minutes of my life, phrasing the words and the thoughts that the message carried with it. My friend didn’t want to sound mean in anyway so we had to properly put the words together in a manner that was direct and forward yet not demeaning.

Everything turned out pretty well on our side. The guy said he understands; he asked that they remain friends and try to avoid being awkward with one another. (Well, of course they’ll remain friends. That’s Kristin wants to hear from him afterall.)

[Now you know what happens when college girls who never experienced dating got asked out on a date by someone they don’t like.]

I feel sorry for the guy. But in my opinion it is better this way that my friend had told him that she doesn’t want anything more than friendship from Jomell instead of leading him on and raising his hopes higher then letting him fall on rock at the end of the day. I am not defending the actions of my bestfriend or whatever, however I support her in what she did because I see that there is genuine love for the guy.

Genuine love. Sympathy and pity are not love. Sometimes you have to say some words and phrases that might hurt the person but that doesn’t mean it’s not love. Freeing him is already love. My bestfriend’s action actually frees them both and I think that it embodies with it an authentic love.

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3 thoughts on “An Ending Before its Beginning

  1. Happylifeaholic says:

    Aah. Hopefully it doesn’t get awkward with him. I had a similar experience last year. A guy from my freshman floor asked me out, and I didn’t realize he was asking me on a date. So I said “yeah sure we can hang out’. Next thing I know, I’m at a really awkward date.I felt bad so I tried to make it work and went on a second “date” with him which was even more awkward than the first. He had already told his mom he had a “girlfriend” – like WHAAAT? 2 dates does NOT mean we’re dating! So I broke it off with him after that. I said I was too busy with school to date – which wasn’t true since I was going to parties and stuff, but whatever – and it got uber awkward between us. Now we chat on facebook sometimes, and he says that when school re-opens after summer, I should join him on a walk sometime. Lol. That was a really long comment. Sorry. =p

    • Max Hidalgo says:

      i appreciate your comment! 🙂 so what if it’s long? haha. anyway, 2 dates doesn’t mean you’re already together. okay i was like, “oh my! hahaha… *laughed really hard*” when i read your story. anyway, my friend has to put an extra effort to prevent the situation from being awkward because she has a stronger personality than the guy. thanks for reading and i hope we can be friends! 🙂

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